It's Valentine's Day.

I’d love to have a really witty retort to follow that obviously pedestrian statement, but I don’t. What can I say? I’m a married man. The ring on my finger somehow manages to sap most of my romantic predilections. This year for Valentine’s, I got my wife a purse. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a kick-ass purse, but that sort of gift lacks the kind of sitcom romanticism that we as a culture have come to expect.

I understand that this isn’t exactly a nerd-friendly holiday. Historically speaking, nerds aren’t exactly the type to ride in on ye olde white steed and woo their preferred gender with wit and charm. But the image of the nerd as a lonely, wistful, unattractive wallflower is slowly fading. There are, in our midst, a progressive group of geeks who are, like me, happily coupled. There are nerdy fellows who are suave, sophisticated, and confident. Shit, in nerdcore hip-hop alone there are a number of beautiful, beguiling, sexy young women who turn many-a head even outside of our circle.

As hard as it may be for some to believe, being a nerd doesn’t necessarily mean that one is entirely socially inept. I’ll wager that there’s probably an element of awkwardness that many of us share, but our people generally exorcise such demons for the greater good. I guess what I’m getting at is that we’re not all Duckie. And many of those of us who are have long since learned to turn our respective eccentricities into pleasant positives rather than humiliating handicaps.

So today, in light of the inherent romantic undertones, I’d like to wish all you love struck nerds out there – even those of you who, like me, may’ve grown a little lax in the passion department – the best. May your champagne flow free, your chocolates not melt, and may you and your partner be making the sweet, nerdy love by nightfall.

If you’re in the Seattle area, you’ll probably want to make your way down to Columbia City Theatre for the launch party for Ultraklystron’s Romance Language. Karl and company swear to sex up your eardrums to the utmost of their combined ability. But worry not; they will be gentle.

It promises to be an ideal place for you West Coasters to take that special guy/girl. Consequently, for you single types, I can’t think of any better place to go trolling for a new crush than a nerdcore show. Hell, it’s almost too easy.